Don't mess with me, now

My Obsession

Okay, okay. I'm a teensy bit excited about Rhinebeck. It's gotten to this point: I have volunteered to drive almost 30 minutes in the opposite direction on Saturday morning to pick up J and the R's just so we can leave really really early.

I figure that it will be a lot easier to dump the girls directly onto the back seat of my car in their sleep and get right on the road than it would be for me to:

1. Wait over at my house for them to stumble sleepily to their mom's car in Sag Harbor, in the dark, possibly forgetting a shoe or a headphone or a toothbrush. [For this example, I am using the R's, but they are their mother's daughters in the never-on-time and I-forgot-something department. I love them all to death, absolutely.]
2. Watch as they discover that there is a missing item or items when they spill out of their car in my driveway in Southampton, sometime after sunrise.
3. Wait while the car is unloaded and its contents searched for the missing item(s), before being reloaded into my car, item(s) or no, because We Must Leave NOW, Women!
4. Risk a speeding ticket on the LIE just because I have this thing about procuring an obscene amount of Socks That Rock sock yarn, and I'm positive that The Fold will sell every last skein before I arrive, breathless, trailing possibly shoeless children, at their booth in Building A.

So, I'm going to drive almost 30 minutes in the opposite direction in order to save at least two hours, as well as my last remaining shreds of sanity. And no, I do not need a Yarn Intervention. This is Rhinebeck. Once a year. I'm in charge.

There's been a little knitting progress hereabouts, but nothing worth showing. I keep picking up one thing and knitting a few rows before putting it down and picking up something else. Supposedly this means that one day all the projects will be finished, but it sure seems more like I'm getting nowhere. Doesn't matter, though, does it? I can get lots of new yarn this weekend and start a whole bunch of new stuff!

Jane Time

It's dark and rainy, and that kind of damp-cold that makes my joints ache and complain. I've been out to do the errandy things, and the never-ending laundry is my only chore. I have DVD's to watch, maybe I'll even take a nap, and this warm red-orange Dulaan hat is on the needles. I'm using a pattern called "Kim's Hats" from Last-Minute Knitted Gifts. It's a basic formula, with variations for size and brim style. When I make things like this I realize that I could have written this pattern myself, because it's nothing really new. I'm just as happy that someone else wrote it out, though, because I don't have to do any thinking. All I have to do is knit, and this knitting is fun and satisfying. I love the color combination of the burnt orange (Patons Classic wool) and the tweedy red (Dale Sisik wool/mohair). It puts me in the mood for...Rhinebeck!

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Thank you for all your comments. You've helped me gain a lot of perspective on this little "crisis." I am so glad to have all five or seven or however many of you visit me here, and I like feeling that I am among friends. I've been painting myself into corners lately, and fussing and fretting a lot -- an old pattern for me. It's always a sign that I need to stop and pay attention to something that I might be avoiding or resisting, or just plain ignoring. Oh, shoot, I just can't get away from myself, can I? At least I have a hat to knit, and I can't run too far away if I'm attached to a ball of yarn.

We do live in two separate worlds here on the Internet, don't we? The line between public and private is blurry, but not invisible. It's really not unlike my daily "real" life. At the bookstore I see friendly customers every day, and we chat about books and the weather and the goings-on in the village. If I see these same people in the grocery store, or at the movies, I tend to want to avoid them. It's not because I'm a grump, but because I'm on Jane Time, not Bookstore Time. I smile and nod or wave, or say hello, and that's it. There are a few customers who I've come to think of as friends, but they number about four out of hundreds, so I think my life is still my own, for the most part. We all juggle our public and private lives, and what really astounds and confounds me is that not only do we do it locally and face to face, we do it globally and virtually as well.

I think I'll keep my virtual world the way it is for now. If someone I know asks to read the blog, then I'll see how I feel about it.

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And speaking of Rhinebeck...It's how I am going to make it through the week. By this time next Sunday we'll be getting in the car to come home, laden with Socks That Rock (and green for Amie?) and fiberfiberfiber, with happy tired feet, and with pictures and memories and who-knows-what-all. When I informed the Delightful R's that we will be leaving really early Saturday morning I got the usual moans and groans. "You mean six o'clock in the morning?" Then they remembered: We're going on a Road Trip! To see Llamas and Alpacas! And get Yarn and Sheepy Stuff! And have a Slumber Party! Okay then, six it is!

Sometimes I wonder

Warning: I have been Contemplating Life. Again. A recent post by Bess, whose blog I love to read, is the cause this time. Don't blame her, though. She's smart and thoughtful, and I thank her.

According to Bloglines, this blog has five subscribers. Just who am I writing for? Them? Myself? The Great Unknown? I am used to writing my personal thoughts for public consumption; all those years in journal class taught me how to trust my heart, dive in, and have faith that I’d be heard. But that was in an intimate setting. I came to know the people who were listening to my words, and I trusted them just as they did me. So who is listening to me now?

Am I writing for those five people and the handful more that stop by here? No, I’d be posting here even if I knew for sure that I was the only reader. This is as good a place as any to write. I started Not Plain Jane because I had knitting things to say, and because knitting is a vital thread in the rest of my world. And it made sense to invite my virtual friends at KR to visit with me, just as I visit them at their blog-houses.

That’s what I like to think, anyway. I don’t tend to share really personal stuff, because none of you know me and I don’t think I could begin to tell you my story (not that it’s dramatic or anything) without driving you away in a miniature drove. I’ll add stuff to put things in context, the same way I would if we were getting to know each other at, say, a knitting group. But dumping the whole pile at your feet? I wouldn’t dream of it.

The whole virtual world is welcome here, but not the real people who matter to me. What is that about? I’ve given my blog address to exactly one person who knows me in real life. I’m not even sure K reads it. I wouldn’t mind if he didn’t, but of course I hope he does. I don’t invite most of the people I know to read my private journal, so why would I invite them here? The difference between the writing I do in my little red leather book and here at the keyboard is becoming clearer. This is not private. This is the opposite of private. It is not, however, the opposite of personal. Everything is personal. The internet is a surprisingly intimate space after all. Weird, huh?

Some people know I have a blog. I tell them that much, but I don’t offer to share it with them. I pretend it is too risky, or something. The insincerity and arrogance of that attitude has just smacked me on the side of the head. “I write a public blog (read by at least five people!), but you aren’t invited to read it.” Who do I think I am, anyway? I’m going to go try and get over myself now.

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I'm still at knitting loose ends. No wonder -- I am unfocused and work is hectic and my brain short-circuits every time the weather changes, which is often. I made another hat for Dulaan, and I am still slow-poking my way to the end of a sock, so at least that's something.

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To thank you for reading this whole durn post, here is a picture from our last morning in Italy. Florence is down there somewhere, seen from our hotel in Fiesole:

It was a long week

I think I missed some of it. There were seven days, weren't there?

My knitting is all at sixes and sevens. I decided to try to get something finished, like maybe a sock. It would help if I actually worked on one. So this morning I picked up the frogged Go With the Flow sock and began to re-knit the heel. I'm almost finished with the gusset now, and it feels good to be making progress on something. This is the finished one, waiting for its mate.

I made a little progress on the Rib and Cable sock, but not much beyond this photograph. It's a nice pattern, and interesting to knit. There are a few variations on the basic sock formula that I'm enjoying. The toe, if I ever get there, looks really neat. I got my copy of Nancy Bush's Knitting Vintage Socks, too, and I think I'll be knitting out of it for a long time to come.

That scarf I took with me on my trip is an easy knit, brainless and good for travel. The yarn though, is filled with knots. Why didn't I pay attention to them when I was balling the skein? It's superwash merino, too, so I can't spit splice it with any consistency. Oh, well. That will teach me!

I finally photographed the cardigan I made last September. It's "Herdis" from Elspeth Lavold's first collection. [Edited on 10/8 to correct the crappy image that I posted the first time.]At the time it was the most complicated thing I'd ever undertaken, but as I got going it wasn't hard at all. If I had it to do all over again, I'd go down a needle size. I got gauge, but the fabric has a lot of give and it seems to grow when I wear it. Re-blocking didn't change it much. I still love it, and it represents a major knitting accomplishment.

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Rhinebeck, Rhinebeck, Rhinebeck! It's coming! Soon! Ohboyohboyohboy! My list is growing, the money is set aside, the car is clean and ready for guest travelers. J and the wonderful R's and I haven't made our final plans yet, but I already know that I'm going to convince them that we need to leave here at the crack of dawn on Saturday. None of this moseying on over to my house whenever, not this year! I have booths to visit, people to meet, and money to spend. Yes, I am geeky enough to have begun to make a list of which vendor is where, so that I won't miss the ones I want to visit. And yes, I am planning to show up at the Spirit Trail booth, probably more than once! I'm a little excited, can you tell? I really need a fiber fix.

And if it's October, it must be time to make serious Retreat plans! I didn't make it to the PO this week, but I hear that our Retreat packets have begun arriving in mailboxes. I'll have to be patient until Wednesday, when I can go get the mail. The KR Retreat following so close on the heels of Rhinebeck makes my head spin. Since I'm turning it into a week, not a weekend, I have lots of things to do beforehand. I'll be making the rounds of family and friends in the DC area, with a final stop on Sunday (I think) at K's house on the Eastern Shore.

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I'd like to be doing this:

Unfortunately, I have to tackle this:It ain't pretty.